Preheat your oven to 325°F (160°C). Line a large baking sheet (approx. 13x18 inches or 33x46 cm) with parchment paper, ensuring it covers the entire surface.

Transfer the entire 16 oz container of full-fat cottage cheese to a high-speed blender. Blend on high until completely smooth and creamy, scraping down the sides as needed. This may take 1-2 minutes. The consistency should be like a thick, pourable cream.

Reserve about 1/2 cup of the blended cottage cheese for the "Alfredo" sauce. Pour the remaining blended cottage cheese onto the prepared parchment-lined baking sheet. Using an offset spatula or the back of a spoon, carefully spread the cottage cheese mixture into a very thin, even layer, aiming for about 1/8 inch (3-4mm) thickness across the entire sheet. Ensure there are no major gaps or thick spots.

Bake for 25-30 minutes, or until the cottage cheese sheet is firm to the touch, mostly dry, and starting to turn golden brown around the edges. It should be flexible but not sticky or wet. The exact time will depend on your oven and the thickness of the spread.

Once baked, remove the baking sheet from the oven and let the cottage cheese sheet cool completely on the parchment paper. This is crucial for it to firm up and become easier to handle. Once cool (about 10-15 minutes), carefully peel the cottage cheese sheet from the parchment paper. Place it on a clean cutting board.

Using a sharp knife or pizza cutter, cut the sheet lengthwise into "fettuccine" strips, about 1/2 to 3/4 inch (1.2-2 cm) wide.

While the "pasta" cools, gently warm the reserved 1/2 cup of blended cottage cheese in a small saucepan over low heat. Stir continuously until it's just warmed through and slightly thinned, about 2-3 minutes. Do not boil. If desired, you can add a pinch of salt and black pepper here, or a tiny splash of water if it's too thick.

Divide the cottage cheese "fettuccine" among two plates. Spoon the warm "Alfredo" sauce generously over the "pasta". Serve immediately.